Man Who Does Not See Race Outraged by Character’s Skin Color

Bobby Brian, a sensible man who has oft been quoted as “not seeing race,” has declared a boycott on Netflix after the streaming service revealed that Ciri, a character in its upcoming show, “The Witcher”, will be played by a woman of color.

“Netflix is trying to ruin a great series with social justice,” Brian told the Bard. “This is even worse than when Michael B. Jordan played Johnny Storm or when Samuel L. Jackson played Nick Fury.” Brian then sniffled as he drew a finger across the poster of David Hasselhoff on his wall.

Brian’s boycott has already gathered steam as other sensible men who do not see race and wish social justice warriors would stop making race a big deal join the cause. Along with the demand to recast a white woman as Ciri, they also demand that a white woman play Starfire in DC’s “Titans” show, and a white man play Nick Fury in the next Marvel movie.

“This has nothing to do with race,” Brian insisted repeatedly to the Bard. “Netflix cast Geralt perfectly with Henry Caville. Why botch it up and make Ciri black?”

Netflix has not responded to requests for comment as of this article’s publication.

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